The Meanderings of A country housewife and mother.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

15 things to do at walmart

15 Things to do at Walmart while your spouse/partner is taking their sweet time:
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell them "Code 3 in Housewares" and see what they do.
5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!" And, last, but not least!
15. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait awhile; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here
4:23 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment

2 comments:

Bonita said...

LOL - now, YOU could be dangerous.

M. C. Pearson said...

OMG that was too funny...I worked at Wal-Mart about 13 years ago...I would have gotten a kick watching you! Ha!

Music

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I just enjoy life. Especially my family and all the little things life has to offer. I love reading and chatting with my online friends and quilting. I always have a project started. Sometimes I have two or three going.